THE TOXIC RELATIONSHIP BETWEEN AN EMPATH AND A NARCISSIST.
... ONCE THEY GET WHAT THEY WANT, THEY ARE GONE...
THEY HAVE MOVED ON BECAUSE THEY HAVE BEEN CAUGHT AND BECAUSE THEY SEE ANOTHER OPPORTUNITY TO GET SOMETHING BETTER.
Nothing is accidental or a coincidence when a narcissist is involved.
They watch and they wait until they see that you are at your most vulnerable and that is when they make their move.
They confess undying love and loyalty to you while undermining all of your relationships with family and friends.
They do not have friends of their own so they try to take yours. If your friend is wise to what they are doing they destroy your friendship and isolate you from your friend and anyone else who sees the narcissist for who and what they are.
The narcissist has no credentials or education because they never complete any goal. They will falsify documents and make up a prestigious work and educational history that never existed.
They do not want you to interact with their family in case one of their family members tries to warn you that the narcissist is the black sheep and has screwed over every member of the family.
lntelligent people are often the victims of narcissists because intelligent people are often strong and driven and they are often cautious when embarking on a romantic relationship.
Intelligent people are often lonely and very selective when they engage in romance. When someone comes along who presents as successful, driven, and pretends to be independent the victim feels they have found their equal meaning they have found someone who has everything they have and the relationship is based on love and equality and the victim believes the narcissist truly loves them because the narcissist gives the impression that they want the victim they do not need the victim to exploit them.
It is also easy to fall in love with someone who you believe is going to take care of you and love you.
It makes you feel as if you are a person worthy and deserving of love in your own right with no strings or motive attached.
Someone who appears to be everything you have wanted and more has made you believe that you do not have to do “anything’’ to be loved and treated with respect without strings attached.
Being in love with a narcissist is intoxicating and is what dreams and fairy tales are made of and the feeling although short lived is what we have been waiting for all of our lives.
Like an addict the first high is always the best and we keep indulging hoping to recapture the euphoria of that first high never realizing until we crash and burn that that once in a lifetime feeling was nothing more than a well constructed illusion created by the narcissist to keep us coming back for that fix that addicted us to the narcissist in the first place.
The narcissist gives us just enough love and attention when they have destroyed us to keep the fantasy alive so we can live on false hope that everything will go back to the perfect love we believed in at the beginning of the relationship until they destroy us again.
When someone comes who seems to offer unconditional love and will support us as well with financial autonomy it is a dream come true.
Victims of a narcissist are NEVER to blame for what the narcissist does to destroy their life.
We are all fools to a certain extent when it comes to love and no one is immune to be taken for a ride by a professional heart-breaker.
I’m afraid you are not going to like this, but you need to know the harsh truth, because only once you accept this can you move on. Narcs are not scared to admit their feelings- they don’t have any of those feelings. You may love the narc, but the narc does not love you back. I know the narc said he or she did, but that was just to seduce you into the narc trap, and it was a lie. Everything the narc says and does after the devalue starts will confirm this. No one who loved you would ever treat you with this condescension and cruelty. The narc is cheating on you and lying to you. That is not because the narc is afraid- it is because the narc has no feelings for you beyond what you supply- money, a clean house, sex? And this will never change, no matter how hard you try and how much you love the narc. It will never be reciprocated and you will be unhappy the whole time you are together. Every month you spend with a narc is a wasted month, and you will never get it back. Please choose happiness, which means making the difficult decision to give up on the narc. Believe me, you will be replaced instantly (he or she has alternatives lined up already) and that will confirm, as nothing else does, that there was no love there. I know you love him or her, we all did, all us victims, but we had the misfortune to be targeted by a narc, and that meant we were never going to be loved, just manipulated. Please learn about the disorder so you can see why I say this, and why your escape is the only option if you want a happy life.
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HOW CAN SOMETHING BE BOTH THE BEST AND THE WORSE THINGS THAT EVER HAPPENED TO YOU?
by Timothy Snow
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